Happiness: the fleeting dream that eludes most of us. I am often miserable, pressed for time, running around in my insular little world, only catching glimpses of the world around me as I peer through dung coloured glasses. Yet the solution to my dilemma is remarkably easy.
Stop.
Take off my dung coloured lenses.
Look and really see all the blessings around me.
Appreciate and allow gratitude to come to life within me once again.
A therapist would charge you hundreds of dollars to teach you how to do this, calling this method cognitive therapy.
I will give you this key to happiness for free.
I discovered this secret after years of mothering my tiny children. They taught me to take my eyes off my exhaustion and to take delight in the plethora of tiny details all around me. Little kids are born with a sense of wonder and the ability to enjoy little things. My daughter’s retain an appreciation for detail; they all remember the little things.
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Examples:
- A friend of mine, Martha, once asked one of my daughters, when she was about six, what she liked most about Christmas. She replied immediately,
“The pineapple in the fruit bowl"
My daughter’s answer astounded Martha.
- Similarly, one evening before dinner Claire, now a young adult, said,
“I always remember the fresh smell of clean sheets every week.”
Such a small thing, yet a child, with a heart full of gratitude, takes great pleasure from it.
- A few months back, Claire was recounting how pleased she was with a plant in her garden. Realizing that she was enjoying such a small thing she laughed,
“Oh my god, I sound just like Mum.”
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- The things that raise my spirits are usually small and most people would not consider them significant. For example, one Christmas I was very tired and only one gift brought me genuine joy. It was hand crocheted dish clothes from my friend Cathy. ..dish clothes, beautifully made, colourful, something I used a hundred times a day.
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Perhaps this is one of the blessings of a large family; free cognitive therapy from a crew of little people who greeted each morning with wonder and awe.
What am I thankful for now, at this moment? I am grateful to be alive, breathing and healthy with a husband of 35 years, nine healthy, kids,. four kid-in-laws and 5 grandchildren who turned out so well that I am speechless and teary eyed with relief and gratitude.
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