Chaining Kids With Fear

Childhood should be a time to play in freedom and joy.

When my oldest children started school in the mid to late eighty's, they played marbles, bounced tennis balls off the school wall and could bring real baseballs and basketballs to school. In short, they played like children have played for generations. By the time they were in grade eight, the principals had banned marbles and real balls from the schoolyard. Why? They were too dangerous!

My oldest daughter drew a picture entitled "Recess at St. Mike's" that shows a girl, standing frozen in place, with a ball and chain around her ankle. Quite revealing, isn't it?

When I was a child, we hopped on bikes without helmets, only wore sunscreen at the beach and ate peanut butter sandwiches. I that the world has changed but along with new, necessary safety measures this generation has put into place, society has burdened children with fear

Childhood is a time to play freedom and joy, freedom to lose themselves in the sheer joy of the present moment, without nagging regret about the past or fear of the future. My family was and is fortunate to live in the country, where my children roamed safely, caught frogs, built forts, explored a creek and created wonderful imaginative games.

One example stands out in my mind. I had gathered everyone for dinner but we were waiting for Anthony. Someone spotted him out the window and called the rest of us over to see him. There was Anthony on the platform of our large wooden play structure, wearing his usual uniform consisting of a black cape, black barn boots and grey felt hat, engaged in a fierce sword fight with an imaginary enemy. Suddenly he clutched his chest and staggered over to lean on the railing. Then rallying his draining energy and stamina, he suddenly rose up and with a courageous flourish thrust his sword into his evil opponent and collapsed in exhaustion and agony.

We were all delighted with his imaginary drama.

Children need free, unstructured time to let their imaginations fly.

This can only happen if we refuse to allow our own fears to burden our children and if we give them the time and space to simply be children.

Even Pets Can Have Chores

No able-bodied human or animal would live in my house without contributing in some way to our household

Our pet guinea pig pushed his luck one day when I discovered why Guinea pigs are called PIGS. It is because they eat just like real pigs that’s why.

I was losing patience with ours; every time I opened the fridge that little rodent would squeak like crazy, begging for another vegetable.

One day, I marched out into our garden and pulled out an entire stalk of broccoli and stuffed it in the guinea pig’s cage. I stuffed the entire cage with greens, mini broccoli and a thick, fibrous stalk. The wire door didn’t even close completely.

The next morning the entire plant was gone, only a few tough, stringy fibers left. When I opened the fridge door, that guinea pig started squeaking for food once more. I couldn’t believe it; his stomach should have burst open.

Then I made a decision.

No able-bodied human or animal would live in my house without contributing in some way to our household. I decided that this particular animal was going to trim the grass around the house. I gathered the oldest four kids together and explained that we were taking the bottom off the cage and placing it right beside the house where there were no gardens. Every few hours, someone would move the cage.

It was a brilliant idea.

The kids thought it was hilarious that a guinea pig would have a household chore and I was quite pleased to have a little more peace in the kitchen.

However, I forgot to consider that we lived in the country. Foxes, coyotes, wolves and even owls love to snack on rodents. One morning the cage was knocked over and all that was left of this little guinea pig was his gizzard. David was sure that it was no ordinary predator that had attacked our guinea pig. No, it was a big, black bear and he knew that to be a fact because he could see,

“the big, bloody, footprints down the lane!”

Great Quotes About Children

Dr. Seuss, authour

“A person’s a person, no matter how small.”

Nelson Mandela,

We owe our children, the most vulnerable citizens in our society, a life free of violence and fear.”

“There can be no keener revelation of a society’s soul than the way in which it treats its children.”

Albert Einstein -

The pursuit of truth and beauty is a sphere of activity in which we are permitted to remain children all our lives. 

- Anonymous 
 “Children are great imitators. So give them something great to imitate.”

Barbara Bush, former U.S. first lady“

You have to love your children unselfishly.”

English proverb

The soul is healed by being with children.”

                                                                                    John W. Whitehead, founder, Rutherford Institute

“Children are the living messages we send to a time we will not see.”

Frederick Douglass

 It is easier to build strong children than to repair broken men.

The most interesting information comes from children, for they tell all they know and then stop.

Mark Twain  

Mohandas Gandhi,“

If we are to teach real peace in this world, and if we are to carry on a real war against war, we shall have to begin with the children.”

Emma Goldman, author“No one has yet fully realized the wealth of sympathy, kindness and generosity hidden in the soul of a child. The effort of every true education should be to unlock that treasure.”

Lady Bird Johnson, former U.S. first lady

“Children are likely to live up to what you believe of them.”

 Mignon McLaughlin, journalist and author

“Only where children gather is 

there any real chance of fun.

Daisy,Our High Maintenance Goat

Kids need to relate to animals to grow up into well-balance, caring adults who can relate and feel connected to the natural world, not just technological society.

Daisy entertained us with her antics even more than our traditional pets.

For over two decades, we lived on a hobby farm surrounded by nine kids, wild animals, farm livestock as well as traditional pets. Kids need to relate to animals to grow up into well-balance, caring adults who can relate and feel connected to the natural world, not just technological society. Just watching our children’s delight in their menagerie of pets and farm animals confirmed how important animals were to their development.Their unconditional love was a powerful sources of energy that transformed our animals into confidant, intelligent creatures with strong, unique personalities.

Consider Daisy. She produced milk like any normal, domesticated goat which I made into a delicious dill and garlic cream cheese spread but she did not like living in the barn or fields with the rest of the livestock. Nope, Daisy was sure she was part of the family, expressing her displeasure by bleating loudly until one of the kids ran out to the barn, released her from her isolated stall and tied her to a post with a direct view of the front door.

Daisy needed to relate to people because she was a socialized goat with a charming personality. She even tried to get into the house a few times by gnawing on the door handle to the kitchen. Even once outside, watching the activities of our bustling household, if Daisy hadn’t seen anyone in an hour or so, she’d bleat frantically until I alerted on of the kids by yelling out,to no one in particular,

“Daisy is lonely again!”

One of the little ones would clamber to the kitchen door, haul the heavy door open and call out,

“Daisy, what’s the matter? We are still here. Everything is just fine, so relax!”

If it was cold, they’d slam the door closed and Daisy would calmly return to grazing on our lawn.

Admittedly, Daisy would have made more friends in our family if she had quit eating my flowers or stealing little people’s’ hats and pulling on their scarves.The littlest children loved to pet Daisy and talk to her before heading down the long lane to the school bus but inevitably a cry would arise,

“Help! Somebody help me!Daisy is pulling my scarf off. Daisy won’t give my hat back or Daisy is eating my mitt!”

It is a testament to her charm that the kids could not resist her demands for affection and attention even though she was a nuisance and a pest. Most of the time we had to tie Daisy to a post so she could not cause too many problems. However, a couple of times a week we let Daisy follow us around in the garden. As long as she mainly ate weeds, we let her hang out with us.Dasiy was a delightfully, albeit high maintenance farm pet.

Duck, Deek and Dive.

Everyday I deal with dim-witted but strangely adorable hens. Some days are like an idyllic scene described by Wordsworth but other days are simply frustrating as the reality of country living slaps me in the face.The day we force them outside for the first time is one of those awful days.

In the early summer our chicks lose their down and their feathers slowly grow in. Once their skin is well protected, it is time to introduce the adorable little birds to the great outdoors. Needless to say chickens are well, chicken; we are forced to literally pick up every single little chicken and throw them out the small door into their fenced-in run. Chickens definitely lack courage.

However, as soon as the young birds are off the slanted plank walkway outside, they desperately try scramble back inside. Many manage to dart back in while the mob crowding the doorway stops me from pitching anymore outside. Since we raise free range chickens it is of paramount importance that they spend their days outside. In fact after about ten minutes we cannot convince the little darlings to go back into the large chicken coop till dusk because they relish scratching the dirt for tiny seeds and grain which we scattered around everyday as well as weeds, grass and bugs.Yet the problem is getting them outside for the first time.

It took a few years to perfect our plan of attack on the cowering mass of chickens. Nothing is more frustrating than catching a bird, while trying to herd out a couple more, only to lose all three. You must understand that we are talking about 175 meat birds, bred to eat voraciously.These white rock meat birds can move quickly. Duck, Deek and Dive.

Our final method involved stationing at least one or two children outside, preventing a mass retreat back into the chicken coop as well as scattering the clustering chickens around the door. Basically it is a crowd control issue. I call this Operation DDD because it is planned much like an army mission.

Inside four kids stretch out huge sheets of plastic, moving them slowly so that the plastic barrier resembles two slow-moving walls. This herds the birds in the direction of the small doorway. It is my job to grab the fowl one by one and push or throw them out the door. You cannot possibly imagine how many birds Duck, Deek and Dive out of our hands. Often in sheer frustration we all troop out of the chicken barn once in a while to take a break and grab a glass of water or a snack to fortify our resolve to finish this operation.

Thank the Lord that this particular task is only one day a year.

Weaving the Threads: Barn Cats?

Daily Prompt: Weaving the Threads

Draft a post with three parts, each unrelated to the other, but create a common thread between them by including the same item — an object, a symbol, a place — in each part.

Our House Lyrics

by Crosby, Stills, Nash & Young. From My Girl 2

Our house is a very, very fine house
With two cats in the yard
Life used to be so hard
Now everything is easy
‘Cause of you
And our la,la,la, la,la, la, la, la, la, la, la…..

Our huge, rambling farm-house needed updated and the list of its quirks would fill an entire post. The worst thing was that the house pump was in the barn and above ground which meant it tended to freeze about 4 months of the year when it could drop to  -30 C at night. Despite all the inconveniences, we all loved that house for 18 years because it was full of kids, pets, plants and plastered with kids artwork. I use to sing this song to the kids and they agreed with me, “our house is a very, very fine house” especially because we had cats. The best part was when one of the mother cats was pregnant. Everyone fell in love with the kittens and they were the main focus of everyone’s attention for almost two months. The atmosphere in the house was simply delightful.

Strays were often dropped off at the end of our lane and some flea bags had to find shelter in our barn; I just couldn’t bring them in with babies crawling on the floor. One particular tom cat, Amos, was an old curmudgeon, with old battle scars and a bad temper. Finally my husband had enough of this bully and he took him for a LONG car ride. Three days later, I opened the door and  there sat Amos glaring at me. Michael came charging to the door in utter disbelief. I couldn’t stop laughing and all that day the kids and I sang a Fred Penner song,

The Cat Came Back

Old Mister Johnson had troubles of his own
He had a yellow cat which wouldn’t leave its home;
He tried and he tried to give the cat away,
He gave it to a man goin’ far, far away.

But the cat came back the very next day,
The cat came back, we thought he was a goner
But the cat came back; it just couldn’t stay away.
Away, away, yea, yea, yea

What is a farm without cats to catch  mice? Once we stared raising animals, which meant storing grain,  I quickly changed my perception of the cute, little creatures. Mice eat grain. Mice make nest and shred grain bags. Mice droppings are messy, their urine stinks and no self-respecting farm animal will eat contaminated grain .  Almost daily, a couple of field mice would fall into the grain bins. Michael would scoop them up in a pail, call the cats, the dump the bucket. This was the highlight of the day for our cats; there is nothing they enjoy more that playing with their prey. Often the cats left gruesome mice offerings in thanksgiving right on our doorstep, eliciting screams from the little girls.

A friend gave us a huge, white rabbit but she would leave tiny balls of poop on the floor. Unfortunately, baby Daniel crawled faster than I could sweep, so we moved the rabbit to the barn. A week later, when I moved a couch, I was shocked to find two baby bunnies under it. We all panicked, and started running   to find the mother. In the midst of all the turmoil our mother cat who had only one kitten in an upstairs closet, calmly walked over, lay down and let the rabbits nurse! EXCEPT SHE SEEMS TO QUESTION HER DECISION IN THIS PHOTO.

CATS, you have to love those regal, bossy creature

A Mother's Words

Exploding Cow Pies

We expect playful pranks from boys in their early teens because they delight in stretching the boundaries. Firecrackers offer many exciting possibilities to a creative thirteen year old.

My son, Joseph, along with a neighbour wondered what would happen if they lit a couple of fire crackers and threw them into the family’s country-style mailbox. The result was even funnier than they imagined as the metal door flew up and slammed shut again with a loud clang. Joseph and Riley doubled over with hoots of laughter.

Unfortunately for the boys, who should drive by at that exact moment?

The principal from the local public high school.

The boys noticed a car had stopped. They hopped on their bikes in a frenzy, rode down the long, curved, lane way to Riley’s house and lunged through the front door. However, that did not curtail this conscientious educator; he backed up his station waggon, followed the boys up to the house and rang the door bell. The principle’s stern lecture mortified Riley’s mum and embarrassed the boys. Joseph sheepishly recounted his adventure at the dinner table that night and we just shook our heads.

That incident was never repeated but firecrackers in the hands of one father led to sheer mayhem at our house a few years later.

We were barbecuing with a few other families. In the late afternoon, when the kids were getting restless and hungry, Pierre gathered the kids together, like he often did but this time he led them into the barnyard.

What did this fun-loving father do to amuse the throng of children who surrounded him?

Why he lit firecrackers and placed them in the middle of manure plops! We all heard the squeals and roars of approval from the kids. Before we knew what was happening, Pierre was paying the kids who dared to stand the closest to the smelly, disgusting explosions.We all shook our heads this time but smiled in spite of ourselves, wondering who was more mischievous, Pierre or the kids?

That was before we saw the kids close up. They were splattered with manure. Actually the foul-smelling gunk that covered them wasn’t even manure yet, it was fresh. The other mother’s and I were desperate to bathe our kids before dinner but we simply rinsed out their hair, gave quick sponge baths and I scrambled to find clothes to fit everyone. Rhonda, Pierre’s wife, fumed the loudest about stained clothing and Pierre looking sheepish, helped clean up his four small children.

I must admit that no one has forgotten The Day Cow Pies Exploded. My grown children still laugh in remembrance. I suppose that day is another example of the freedom, joy and muck that a farm makes available to all playful kids, both short and very tall.

A Photo Post: Discovering Joy on a Farm with Nine Kids