"How Much Longer, Lord, How Much Longer?"

Teenagers love to drive parents crazy

Living through teenage drama without loosing your sanity

One of my sons , in his early teens, had just announced that he could not stand living under our roof another minute,
"I'm out of here!", he bellowed, "and don't expect me to come back!"

The door slammed and he tore off on his ten speed bike. Of course my father was visiting and witnessed this dramatic episode. After a few minutes, Dad turned to my husband and wondered,

" Aren't you going to go after him?"

Michael calmly kept reading, then looked up and explained,

"Oh, I'm not worried. The only place near enough to bike to is one of his buddy's and they don't feed kids over there. He'll be back when he is hungry enough."

Sure enough, hunger brought my son home late that night. We did not need to pronounce any ultimatums because the recognition that he still needed to live at home and attempt to get along with our rules and his family

was humbling enough. No need to rub his face in the facts.

Teenagers are often humiliated by their mistakes in judgment so they relish the opportunity to catch us in the wrong.

For example, Michael's usual response to swearing, disrespect or a poor attitude was,

"Leave that sort of stuff at school!"

One evening at the dinner table on a Sunday, Michael yelled in anger at the dog. David had just filled his plate and was coming back to the table. He leaned over, looked at his dad and with a twinkle in his eye and a huge grin on his face said ,

"Leave that sort of stuff at church, eh Dad!"

Michael snapped out of his bad mood and had to smile. The kid was right. David's humour diffused the situation and Michael was the one who had to apologize this time.

Teenagers also love to rile their parents, to flaunt rules and standards in a blind wish to figure out who they are in and of themselves. If I remember this fact, I don't overreact to obnoxious behaviour. I like to compare teenagers to two-year olds because the very same dynamic is unfolding, only this time it is a stressful transition from childhood to adulthood that requires many years to complete. I read somewhere that 25 is the age that young adults finally get an adult brain! In our family, we actually celebrate that birthday and welcome our offspring into full adulthood.

Sometimes teenagers, boys especially like to prove their new-found strength. David loved to come behind me in the kitchen and with a huge grin on his face pick me up and swing me around or even turn me upside down!

"Oh well", I'd think to myself, "This too will pass, this too will pass."

Where Does She Get This Stuff?

three-year-old Lucy was perched like a little elf on a high stool

"Lucy, whose your favorite, mum or dad?"

One afternoon, I was making dinner, standing at the counter with my back to our three youngest children. Katie and Anthony were lounging around the kitchen table, with three-year-old Lucy perched like a little elf on a high stool, happily swinging her legs.

Simply making conversation, Katie who was about eight, asked Lucy,
"Lucy, whose your favorite, mum or dad?"
Lucy replied,"Both!"
Still facing the counter, I looked over my shoulder and intruded on their conversation,
"Smart answer, Lucy."
Lucy was not done, though,
"But she's not my real mum, Mary is.

Katie rolled her eyes, slapped her forehead with the palm of her hand and said incredulously,
"Where does she get this stuff?"I tried to explain as simply as I could,
"Well, the Holy Spirit is in her heart and she listens to His voice."
Lucy jumped right back into the discussion and chanted in a sing-song, lilting voice,
"That's right. God the Father in my heart. Baby Jesus in my heart. Holy Spirit in my heart. Mother Mary in my heart.... but.... I still like mum and dad the best!"
Katie rolled her eyes and plunked her head down on the table with a loud sigh,
"Where does she get this stuff?"
I just laughed.
A few weeks later, as I crouched down to tie Lucy's shoelace, Lucy picked up the small gold cross I wore around my neck and said,
"This is the cross of Jesus and the glory of God shines all around it."
Katie rolled her eyes again, slapped her forehead and asked,
"WHERE does she get this stuff?

The Battle Of The Bugs

try pulling every sticky nit off every single strand of hair on ten heads.

The phrase 'quit nit-picking' took on a whole new meaning after our official Lice Week.

Once again the school had sent notes home about another outbreak of head lice but of course I was confident that we had never had and never would get lice. Over the phone, the school secretary asked me to check Rachel's head. Since she was in morning kindergarten, Rachel had missed the head check that afternoon. It seems that lice epidemics thrive in the younger grades and slowly spread through the entire school.
I laughed and said, "I just washed her hair last night; I really don't think she has any but I'll check anyway."
I called Rachel over to a bright window, parted her hair and peered closely at her scalp. Her head was literally crawling with bugs! After screaming shrilly, I picked up the phone again only to hear the secretary say,
"I guess that is a 'yes', Mrs. Juneau."
I was mortified; Rachel's head was covered and another daughter saw a bug crawling on her forehead in a mirror at school!! I get itchy just remembering Lice Week. Of course the school assured me that lice like clean hair but that did not reassure me at all. In the end, all Rachel's siblings had at least a couple of nits. No one could return to school until they were completely lice and nit free.
Do you have any idea the work that faced us?
In those days health nurses and doctors told us to wash all bedding, favourite stuffed animals, throw pillows, afghans, towels, combs, hair brushes and hair accessories, hats, mitts, scarves, sweaters, clothes, pyjamas and house coats and finally both sets of snowsuits (the good set and the farm set). In addition, it was necessary to vacuum Chesterfields, chairs, rugs and anything touched by a head of hair. Those directions amounted to almost 60 loads of laundry! I filled a bathtub almost to the ceiling with stuff I had to wash. I solemnly swear, I do not exaggerate but that was not the hardest job in the next few days.
I had to wash ten heads of hair with awful smelling shampoo, then comb out every nit with vinegar and a special fine-tooted steal comb. Are you familiar with the saying, 'oh quit nit -picking'? Well, it takes on a whole new meaning after you've tried to pull every sticky nit off single strands of hair on ten heads.
So what does a slightly paranoid, overwhelmed mother do? She arranges everyone according to age and size to simultaneously check each others' head. At least that helped with the more obvious eggs.
However, I was given a wonderful gift. A couple of my kids became expert nit pickers. The best nit pickers were the detail oriented offspring, who were slightly obsessive-compulsive; I grew to treasure that particular weakness during the next couple of weeks because one overlooked nit could explode into hundreds of offspring in a matter of days. Now that could cause a nightmare!
I wished I could say that this episode was the one and only "Battle of the Bugs" our family endured but kindergarten classes are notorious hotbeds for lice; the kids are always head to head examining something utterly fascinating with friends.
At least the next time lice hopped on a Juneau head we were battle ready.

First Choice Home Haircuts: I Don't Think So!

my daughter had beautiful blond, wavy hair.

Imagine this scene: a little girl sits on a stool with a huge sheet tied around her neck, a pained expression on her face and a bowl on her head waiting for a haircut.

Do you remember this humourous, family kitchen scene, perhaps from the forty's or fifty's? A child sits on a stool with a huge sheet tied around their neck, a pained expression on their face and a bowl on their head as Mother stands poised behind them, scissors in hand? This family vignette came to life in the early 1990's.

Our whole family had driven out to visit a another large family for dinner. (Who else but another large family ever had enough courage to invite us, even if the meal was potluck?) Afterwards, Ginger invited my two oldest daughters to sleep over for one night.

Sarah phoned home in great excitement the next morning; my friend was cutting hair and would I allow her to give my daughter a shorter haircut,

"...PLEEEASE?"

Assuming that my friend was a competent hair dresser, I readily agreed because I was a reluctant hair stylist. This assumption was a serious lapse in common sense. Ginger must have learned how to cut hair from her grandmother because after she carefully combed my daughter's hair, she placed a bowl on her head to act as a cutting guide. My oldest daughter stood on the sidelines in shocked silence as this scene unfolded.

Later that day, when Sarah rushed through the door to show me her new haircut , I managed to smile weakly at her. At least Ginger had used a very large, deep bowl as her pattern and Sarah's hair was still long enough to redeem.

Most people with a lot of kids cut their hair at home. Michael cut the boy's hair and became a confident barber. However I often panicked as I played hairdresser to the girls. In my defense I will say that I almost always manage to fix my blunders, thank God. The trick was to keep my daughters' hair long. Even then, I trimmed it with great fear and trembling because an odd genetic deficiency cripples me; I find it difficult to cut straight. The consequences of my handicap meant that I constantly juggled back and forth, from side to side, cutting a bit more hair each time. My brilliant strategy was to only trim a bit of hair at first. After all my adjustments, the hair was just the right length.

Of course there was the time I cut a couple of my girl's hair short, pixie style. Overall the hair style was cute but definitely not professional looking. A couple of younger daughters cut their own bangs and achieved a 'back to basics' look.Claire's creation was the worst because she cut her own bangs at three years old, with child safety scissors, an inch from her scalp in some spots and two or three inches in other spots. The only option available to me that time was to cut Clare's bangs all the same length and then to persuade her to wear stretchy, soft cloth headbands that practically covered her hairline.

However the funniest hair cutting story involved seventeen-year-old Mary and her thirteen-year-old sister, Rebecca. Rebbecca desperately needed her bangs trimmed but she refused to let me near her with a pair of scissors. She was actually very astute, I must admit.

Mary, however, was confident that she understood the theory behind professionally trimmed bangs. She announced that she would be pleased to help Rebecca out. Mary feathered her bangs well. Her one mistake however was to pull firmly on Rebecca's wet hair while she cut. Rebecca's hair is very curly. When Mary let go and the hair dried, her bangs sprang up and looked like they were about an inch long.

Rebecca burst into tears and Mary burst out laughing. In fact, she laughed so hard that she hit her head on the counter. Everyone came racing in and of course and started to laugh. Finally, holding back giggles, older siblings rounded up headbands, their own special pins, clips and combs and managed to console Rebecca.

Just this weekend, four years later, all the sisters were remembering the Bang's Catastrophe while laughing hysterically. Only this time Rebecca joined in.

What Does Jesus Do With Ghosts?

David, mischievous, playful but deeply in tune with the Spirit

"These guys have big guns and they just point them at a ghost and kaboom, the ghost disappears!"

Michael's father, a police officer, had given our family free tickets to a large three-ring circus production that the police department were sponsoring. Of course after a few hours, the flashing lights, loud music, breath-taking suspense, excitement and cotton candy overstimulated all six kids. Rather than playing like they usually did, everyone was hyperactive, yelling and becoming increasingly agitated.
It was obvious that I needed to intervene and help them unwind. I don't like sticking kids in front of the T.V. but this was an emergency. None of the kids could believe their good fortune and immediately fell silent as I tried to find a decent show. Soon, they were completely enthralled by a cartoon called "Ghost Busters". At that point, even though I had never let them watch this particular show, I was just happy that everyone was gradually unwinding.
Not David though. He came barreling into the kitchen after ten minutes and yelled,
"Mum, mum, you've got to see this show. These guys have big guns and they just point them at a ghost and kaboom, the ghost disappears!"
I sighed and said,
"David, guns don't really work against ghosts."
Immediately David wondered,
"Well, what does work?"
I explained,
"You shouldn't try to deal with ghosts, just send them to Jesus." Dave paused for a moment and asked,
"So, what does Jesus do with ghosts when He gets them?
I laughed so hard that I barely could answer,
"Honey, I really don't have a clue."
David stopped for a moment, and then smiled. I quote my son's exact words,
"I know what He does. He takes them into Himself and fills them with His love."

Ball and Chain in Place? Good. Now You Can Play.

Childhood should be a time to play in freedom and joy;

When my oldest children started school in the mid to late eighty's, they played marbles, bounced tennis balls off the school wall and could bring real baseballs and basketballs to school.

In short, they played like children have played for generations. By the time they were in grade eight, (our country school went from kindergarten to grade eight), marbles and real balls for recess time. Why? They were too dangerous!

My oldest daughter drew a picture entitled "Recess at St. Mike's" that shows a girl, standing frozen in place, with a ball and chain around her ankle. Quite revealing, isn't it?

When I was a child, we hopped on bikes without helmets, only wore sunscreen at the beach and ate peanut butter sandwiches. I understand that the world has changed but along with new, necessary safety measures this generation has put into place, society has burdened children with fear.

Childhood is a time to play in freedom and joy, freedom to lose themselves in the sheer joy of the present moment, without nagging regret about the past or fear of the future. My family was and is fortunate to live in the country, where my children roamed safely, caught frogs, built forts, explored a creek and created wonderful imaginative games.

One example stands out in my mind. I had gathered everyone for dinner but we were waiting for Anthony. Someone spotted him out the window and called the rest of us over to see him. There was Anthony on the platform of our large wooden play structure, wearing his usual uniform consisting of a black cape, black barn boots and grey felt hat, engaged in a fierce sword fight with an imaginary enemy. Suddenly he clutched his chest and staggered over to lean on the railing. Then rallying his draining energy and stamina, he suddenly rose up and with a courageous flourish thrust his sword into his evil opponent and collapsed in exhaustion and agony.

We were all delighted with his imaginary drama.

Children need free, unstructured time to let their imaginations fly.
This can only happen if we refuse to allow our own fears to burden our children and if we give them the time and space to simply be children.

The Wisdom of Mothers

.

Raising children is definitely not a default chore for women who were not successful in the world of business, power and wealth.

Exactly how society forms the next generation will directly influence the kind of society that they in

turn create. Do we want a world focused only on the ruthless accumulation of wealth? Are we

 creating a race of humans who are becoming increasingly shallow, cold and cynical about

relationships, family and love?

A smile

for the wisdom of mothers

practical

intuitive

simple

clear.

Tears

for the suffering

necessary to acquire

wisdom

not knowledge.

Painful regret

for this hectic
modern
society
scrambling after
glitter
efficiency
success
while pushing
the wisdom of mothers
to the fringes of influence.

Joyful hope
that mothers
will reveal
their unique
wisdom
joy
strength
to a jaded
cynical
world
a world that has forgotten
that all is fleeting
except love.
Especially the love for a child.

“You're Never Too Old, Too Wacky, Too Wild, To Pick Up A Book And Read To A Child.”

“I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living.”

Seuss embraced the life of the imagination and detested staid adults who dismissed the whimsical,

“Adults are just obsolete children and the hell with them.” ― Dr. Seuss

     

These quotations From Dr. Seuss hardly need an introduction. Any one who is or has been a parent will reconize most of them.This selection focuses on phrases that urge people to look at life with joyful expectation. I won't even bother expounding  on these quotes because Dr. Seuss says everything much better than I can. Anyway, Seuss hated wordy writing,
"So the writer who breeds more words than he needs, is making a chore for the reader who reads.” ― Dr. Seuss

"Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened.”

“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. You're on your own. And you know what you know. And YOU are the one who'll decide where to go...”

“Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.” 

     

Born: March 2, 1904, Springfield Died: September 24, 1991, La Jolla Full name: Theodor Seuss Geisel Spouse: Helen Palmer Geisel (m. 1927–1967) Movies and TV shows: The Lorax, The Cat in the Hat, Horton Hears a Who!, How the Grinch Stole Christmas!, The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T, In Search of Dr. Seuss, The Wubbulous World of Dr. Seuss, Halloween Is Grinch Night, Pontoffel Pock, Where Are You?, Gerald McBoing-Boing, The Hoober- Bloob Highway, The Grinch Grinches the Cat in the Hat, Dr. Seuss on the Loose, Your Job In Germany, Spies, A Lecture on Camouflage, Going Home, Welcome, The Butter Battle Book, Rumors, The Big Fun Carnival, Dr. Seuss: How the Grinch Stole Christmas, PBS Kids Goes On Vacation, The Gerald McBoing-Boing ShowMore

                                                                                                                                             

 “The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more that you learn, the more places you'll go.”

“A person's a person, no matter how small.”

"If things start happening, don't worry, don't stew, just go right along and you'll start happening too.”

“You're off to Great Places!

Today is your day!

Your mountain is waiting,

So... get on your way!”

 “Why fit in when you were born to stand out?”

“Today was good. Today was fun. Tomorrow is another one.”

“So be sure when you step, Step with care and great tact. And remember that life's A Great Balancing Act.

And will you succeed? Yes! You will, indeed! (98 and ¾ percent guaranteed) Kid, you'll move mountains.”

“If you never did you should. These things are fun and fun is good.”

“You’ll miss the best things if you keep your eyes shut.”

 

“Think and wonder, wonder and think.”

“Be who you are and say what you feel,

because those who mind don't matter,

and those who matter don't mind.”

A Theological Debate: Child's Play

It was early evening.

We often played musical beds at bedtime because the kids liked the security of a sibling or two falling asleep with them, especially when older brothers and sisters were still up and having fun.  So it happened that I was laying down on Emily's bed nursing an infant while she played with my hair and sucked her thumb. Five-year-old David  was almost asleep across the room. His breathing was slow and deep. The only other sound in the peaceful room came from a fan that created  just enough white noise to drown out the other kid's voices.

David suddenly sat straight up in bed, popped his eyes open and yelled excitedly,

"Someone just called my name. I think it was God!"

Emily  took her thumb out of her mouth and lisped

"Who is God?"

I turned my head to look at her and smiled, "You know, God the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit."

Emily was still puzzled,

"You mean the priest at church?"

"No", I responded, "The God that fills the whole universe."

Emily took her thumb out of her mouth and said very dismissively,

"Oh, HIMMMM. I know HIMMMMM."

Then she closed her eyes and stuck her thumb back in her mouth.
 Discussion closed.

I barely held in my laughter. This little squirt took for granted her close relationship with the Living God, King of Kings and Lord of Lords. God is close to babies and little children. His relationship with them is not complicated, as natural as breathing. They are simply His children; He loves them and they reflect love back.

David interrupted and added joyfully,

"Well, He called my name!"

Emily opened her eyes and stated very authoritatively but in a nasal, little girl voice,
"It was just your imagination, Dave." 

Then she closed her eyes and started sucking her thumb again.

David was upset. I countered her statement,
"It could be God, Emily. The Holy Spirit lives in our hearts and does communicate with us."

David was satisfied and he lay back down to sleep.

But Emily, with her eyes still closed whispered to me,
"It was just his imagination!"
Then she popped her thumb back into her mouth.
Discussion closed.

Stunning Photos Re-blogged fromthisworldthrumyeyes

I couldn't resist posting photos from this site. For more of this photographers' gorgeous short please visit her sitehttp://thisworldthrumyeyes.wordpress.com/

                                           Black and White @ the Conservatory

 

Which One Do You Like Best                                                On the Water

The Traumatized Chicken Encounters The Sly Fox

Red was very adept at snatching chickens

We all marvelled at the fox's audacity because this episode occurred in broad daylight

The sly fox.
No words better describe our intelligent, resident fox. Red consistently fooled our dumb guard dog by laying his foxy scent in pointless circles. He knew that Shadow, our dog, would follow his nose mindlessly and not use his eyes. However, we soon discovered that Red was even more adept at nabbing chickens than outwitting our dog.
About five years ago, Michael was by the house when suddenly a streak of red caught his eye. He was surprised to realize that this was our fox, out in broad daylight. Michael lost sight of him but he yelled for our dog a moment later when he saw a large, white feathered chicken in the foxes' mouth. Red looked over at the dog, who had leaped excitedly over a garden bed. The smart fox decided that the heavy chicken wasn't worth dying for and he immediately dropped his supper. Quick thinking as alwyas, even in a crisis, Red ran into some bushes between the chicken coop and the barn, squirmed out, changed directions and ran into the cornfield. Shadow was left in his wake, sniffing in circles among the bushes around the barn. Of course our great guard dog didn't catch on to the fact that the fox was long gone.
Meanwhile Michael rushed over to the traumatized chicken. That chicken had not moved one feather since she was dropped, nor had she uttered a sound!
Chickens always cluck, especially when they are frightened or startled. The clucking then rises in pitch and speed and transforms into nerve rattling squawking. Not this stunned bird. Michael noticed that there wasn't a scratch on her because the fox only bite down with his soft mouth. His teeth did not pierce the chicken's skin at all, not one drop of blood. Michael gently placed the chicken back into the outdoor run and still she sat, silently like a statute!
We all marvelled at the fox's audacity because this episode occurred in broad daylight. Red did not even wait for the cover of darkness, nor did he care that his enemy,our 'guard dog' was around. What he had been doing during daylight hours, for almost two weeks was sneaking through the long grass just beyond the chicken wire fence then slipping right into the chicken run and snatching birds. The whole process had been a silent one. It seems the chickens were as shocked as we were and no chicken alarm was raised. We were oblivious to the fox's tricks till the day when Red became a little too bold.
We quickly fixed the fence , thereby cutting off his easy pickings. Do not feel sorry for the sly fox. He had a supply of ten chickens to last him a long time.

Read more at http://www.broowaha.com/articles/14599#3XlY0SJj3vZAPbEI.99

Why Did You Have So Many Kids?

my oldest daughter is ducking behind her dad and I am pregnant with our ninth child

The very existence of a joyful mother of nine children seems to confound people.

When the words The Joy Of Mothering popped into my head as a title for my short stories it was like an epiphany for me because those few words verbalized my experience living with little people. The very existence of a joyful mother of nine children seems to confound people. However, it has been far from easy, rather it has been a long journey through confusion, guilt and public condemnation to reach the point where I can now shout loudly,
"This is my call, this is my vocation, this is my witness to the world."

After the birth of our fourth child, Michael and I struggled to understand exactly how we were meant to live our lives. We were discussing an article by an author whose main premise was that letting go of control and trusting in God was not some abstract principle but a day-to-day practical call that included the surrender of our fertility. Of course we practised natural family planning but I was one of those rare people who could conceive long before ovulation.

As my doctor said once, "Ah, I remember reading about a woman in New Zealand, two years ago, who conceived five days before ovulation."

I raised my hand and chirped, "Well, you can add me to that list!"

Although we could not imagine how large our family would become, the words of that article resonated within both my husband and I. Guilt lifted off us and a surge of excitement, a sense of purpose welled up from within. Although it took time to really believe that none of our children were simply a failure of the natural family planning method. Many small experiences kept reinforcing the truth the for us that God called each of our children into being with our co-operation. We'd stumbled blindly at times and then a burst of clarity would shine light on our purpose.

For example, twenty-five years ago, I once again slipped into panic mode, worrying if I was pregnant with my fifth child. Suddenly a wave of peace enveloped me and my whole body relaxed.

I heard these words within me,
"This is your call. This is your vocation. This is your witness to the world."
All sorts of objections rushed into my head,
" What on earth do you mean a witness, a witness to what?- stupidityy? People don't understand. They just think we are irresponsible or idiots......"
Then unexpected joy bubbled within me and I sensed these words in my spirit, "I am with you."
Once again a blanket of peace wrapped like a blanket around me. It was an actual physical sensation and I was at peace, my mind calm and my spirit felt strong.
That was it for me; I understood and I said "yes".
Though I still cringed under disapproval from society, I always understood that my children were saving me by compelling me to dive deeper into my spirit. They challenged me to dig deeper, discovering the power of eternal Love at my very core. A love that can stand strong against all opposition

This Canadian Loved Obama's Speech.

Obama's speeches are a bright light shining from the States.

I am an outsider, a Canadian, who rarely watches T.V. but perhaps this gives me a fresh perspective on Obama's speech.

I usually write in the family section but I disagreed so strongly with a recent post on the American President that I took a stab at writing a political article.

A post, written by 'Susan', expressed her angry reaction to a speech given by the American President when he was in Roanoke in July. She was upset because her family had struggled and suffered great hardships to build a business, without any outside help. Obama's words seemed to belittle their efforts.The following is the speech given by President Obama in Roanoke this July.

"There are a lot of wealthy, successful Americans who agree with me -- because they want to give something back. They know they didn't -- look, if you've been successful, you didn't get there on your own. You didn't get there on your own. I'm always struck by people who think, well, it must be because I was just so smart. There are a lot of smart people out there. It must be because I worked harder than everybody else. Let me tell you something -- there are a whole bunch of hardworking people out there.

If you were successful, somebody along the line gave you some help. There was a great teacher somewhere in your life. Somebody helped to create this unbelievable American system that we have that allowed you to thrive. Somebody invested in roads and bridges. If you've got a business -- you didn't build that. Somebody else made that happen. The Internet didn't get invented on its own. Government research created the Internet so that all the companies could make money off the Internet.
The point is, is that when we succeed, we succeed because of our individual initiative, but also because we do things together. There are some things, just like fighting fires, we don't do on our own. I mean, imagine if everybody had their own fire service. That would be a hard way to organize fighting fires.
So we say to ourselves, ever since the founding of this country, you know what, there are some things we do better together. That's how we funded the G.I. Bill. That's how we created the middle class. That's how we built the Golden Gate Bridge or the Hoover Dam. That's how we invented the Internet. That's how we sent a man to the moon. We rise or fall together as one nation and as one people, and that's the reason I'm running for President -- because I still believe in that idea. You are not on your own, we're in this together."

A commentator asked what I thought about this speech, as a mother of a large family, who has worked hard with her husband, to provide for our family. She expected Obama's "attack" on hard-working citizens would upset me. I wasn't upset in the least. It seems to me that many American are quick to take offense and even quicker to attack verbally, often taking quotes out of context.

Now I don't understand all of Obama's policies or his whole agenda but I do know that he strikes me as an intelligent, knowledgeable man who is honestly trying to improve his country. The American system is a strangely adversarial, as other opposing politicians only seem interested in thwarting their president not serving their country. I am an outsider, a Canadian, who rarely watches T.V. but perhaps this gives me a fresh perspective on this typical speech by Obama.

I liked it.

Why?

In my opinion, Obama was not attacking small business people who work hard, seemingly without help. He was talking about something completely different from "Susan". I commiserate with "Susan's" pain because we also have struggled against financial difficulties and faced oppressive forces that seemed bent to destroy us. We felt alone, isolated

However, on a different level, I know that the past generation's ceiling is my floor. I was not forced to "reinvent the wheel " but rather I benefited from the knowledge and practical experience of my fore fathers. Our family is especially grateful to those who fought for freedom and democracy. Our lives would have been very different if we had lived in a communist country.

THAT is what your president was trying to say.

THAT is what he meant.

We are not island unto ourselves, we are a community. Every one's actions and even thoughts, attitudes and emotions affect those around them and even reverberate throughout the larger community.

In Obama's words,"You are not on your own, we're in this together."

Want To Be Happy?: Take off your dung coloured glasses!

 

A child looks at everything with delight.

I received free cognitive therapy because I was surrounded by a crew of little people who greeted each morning with wonder and awe.

The fleeting dream that eludes many of us is happiness. We are running around, miserable in our insular little worlds, only catching glimpses of the world around us through dung coloured glasses.The solution to our dilemma is easy. Stop. Take off our mud coloured lenses. Look. Appreciate. A therapist would charge you hundreds of dollars to teach you how to do this, calling this method cognitive therapy. I will give you this key to happiness for free.
I heard of a fellow who hated his job.Unable to find another position, he finally decided to do something to change his apathy. After dragging himself home every night after work, rather staring at the T.V. all evening, he sat in front of his computer to write. His challenge? To find one thing that he was grateful for that day and write that discovery in a new blog. His posts connected with others and soon he had a huge following. At the request of a publisher, he is now writing a book.
I discovered the same secret after years of mothering my tiny children. They taught me to take my eyes off my exhaustion and to take delight in the plethora of tiny details all around me. Little kids are born with a sense of wonder and the ability to enjoy little things. My daughter's retain an appreciation for detail; they all remember the little things.

A friend of mine once asked Rachel, when she was about six, what she liked most about Christmas. She replied immediately,
"The pineapple."

My daughter's answer astounded Martha. Similarly, one evening before dinner Emily, now a young adult, said,

"I always remember the fresh smell of clean sheets every week."

Such a small thing, yet a child, with a heart full of gratitude, takes great pleasure from it.

A few months back, Katie was recounting how pleased she was with a plant in her garden. Realizing that she was enjoying such a small thing she laughed,

"Oh my god, I sound just like Mum."

Another daughter and her husband of three months celebrated their marriage with a huge wedding reception for two hundred people. Mara had planned every detail from the match covers to the large buffet. Most of all, she poured her creative spirit into making all the decorations by hand with sisters and friends. The reception room, with black backdrops was stunning. From green wheat grass in planters, tissue paper flowers in greens and plum to spray painted Hydrangea blooms in purple, sliver, black and lime green, the room looked professionally decorated.
The things that raise my spirits are usually small and most people would not consider them significant. For example, one Christmas I was very tired and only one gift brought me genuine joy. It was hand crocheted dish clothes from my friend Cathy. ..dish clothes, beautifully made, colourful, something I used a hundred times a day.

Perhaps this is one of the blessings of a large family; free cognitive therapy from a crew of little people who greeted each morning with wonder and awe.

Pre-Natal Memories

Do you remember when you were in mummy's tummy?

A young child, who knows enough words to communicate can describe their life in the womb

The day Melissa turned two, her godmother dropped by to celebrate her birthday. Since Melissa was very articulate for her age, her godmother wanted to try an experiment she had about read in a hospital newsletter. The article stated that if you asked a young child, when they knew enough words to communicate but before they were too old, they could tell you about their life in the womb. So we decided to test this premise.
Melissa was very tiny but smart, so she startled people with her clear diction and large vocabulary. This particular day she was standing on a chair behind the kitchen table, playing with a new doll. During the conversation she answered mainly with one word sentences because most of her attention was on her toy.
I felt a bit foolish as I asked my daughter, " Melissa, do you remember when you were in mummy's tummy?
She answered, "yaaa."
So then I wondered if she remembered any details, "What was it like?"
Again Melissa could only spare a one word answer,"Warm."
"What else was it like?" I questioned.
To which Melissa answered quite succinctly, "Dark."
"What could you see?", I probed.Melissa was frustrated by my dumb question, " Nothin; it was dark!"
So I scrambled, "What did you do in my tummy?"
Melissa said nonchalantly, "dwimming."
I checked to make sure I understood her, "Swimming?"
Melissa nodded.
"Did you like living in my tummy?", I wondered.
Melissa nodded again.
Then I thought of a really good question, "Do you remember coming out, being born?"
Melissa scrunched up her nose and sighed, "yaaa."
"What was it like?"
Melissa stopped playing, looked up and said in disgust, "Like a B.M.!!!"(a bowel movement).
That answer shocked me into silence. I looked over at my sister-in-law.
She raised her eyebrows and said one word, "Wow."